Patent Zombie (No. 2).

 

Reproduced with the permission of the author

Timothy J. Riesen
Patent Draftsman
(440) 985-8252
Tim@patentlawdesigns.com

JW Note:  Wishing you a safe and Happy Halloween 2011!  

They Invented What? (No. 210)

U.S. Pat. Appl. Pub. No. 20060259306:  Business method protecting jokes.

JW Note:  Many thanks to Joseph Page for bringing this application to our attention!

Abstract:
The specification describes a method of protecting jokes by filing patent applications therefor, and gives examples of novel jokes to be thus protected. Specific jokes to be protected by the process of the invention include stories about animals playing ball-games, in which alliteration is used in the punch-line; a scheme for raising money for charity by providing dogs for carriage by Underground passengers; and the joke that consists in filing a patent application to protect jokes. A novel type of patent application, one that claims itself, and hence is termed `homoproprietary`, is disclosed.

Claims:

1. The process of protecting a novel joke which comprises filing a patent application defining the novel features of the joke.

They Invented What? (No. 209)

U.S. Pat. No. 1,497,342:  Device for shaping the upper lip.

What is claimed is:

1. A device for shaping the upper lip of a person, comprising a matrix and a clamping means adapted to grip the lip inside and outside at opposite points and centrally of the bow of the lip, said clamping means being movable to draw the lip into the matrix.