Anticipate This!™ | Patent and Trademark Law Blog

They Invented What? (No. 240)

Posted in They Invented What? by Jake Ward on August 4, 2014

U.S. Patent No. 8,609,158:  Diane’s manna.

JW Note:  Thanks to Guy L. for bringing this patent to our attention.  Guy tells us that his favorite quotes also include:

Column 1, Line 24:

“Exhibit G has a combination that is so strong after you quit taking it, that every drug manufacturer on this planet will be wanting to kill me.”

Column 3, Line 12:

“I am almost normal when I take my favorite best method.”

Column 18, Line 10:

Some ingredients include “sand, dirt, rock, volcanic ash…”

Column 20, Line 41:

“The Dr’s had me on $800 per month mood stabilizers”


This is a potent drug with narcotic benefits made from distinctly and uniquely combined and processed interchangeable seed and seed derivatives that are so potent that it removes or alleviates depression, mood disorders, Attention Disorder symptoms, thought disorder, mental illness, pain, right lip retardation symptoms, physical problems, Lymph Node cancer and many other illness symptoms. It removes bumps in the neck within a week or two. It is interchangeable in most aspects. It can be combined and processed with Pharmaceuticals and medicines to create new drugs. These Pharmaceuticals are now long lasting. I prefer the daily dose, but this drug can last months. It is extremely strong or potent and can be made weak to make your little Attention deficit child normal. It is an incredible mood stabilizer and reduces psychosis. Use it for cancer patient and for people with pain issues. It works.


This medicine is a continual drug made from interchangeable ingredients that heals and alleviates the symptoms of many illnesses including cancer and mental illness and pain and many others with the unique benefit it can be combined with medicines like Zyprexa with the benefit of this combination lasting months with a extremely strong, narcotic in nature and easily tamed medicinal benefit for over 21 days. Although please understand, I don’t need to add Zyprexa or Ibuprofen to this medicine because it is good enough to do the job without adding any medicine to it.

This is a food. I used basic food to make this drug. You can use the plants and ingredients from the backyard, the field, or the grocery store to make this drug. This is a medicine that continues inside the human and animal body that will work on most or many symptoms in Exhibit A. Exhibit A and B are a complete or mostly complete list of mine and Micah’s illness symptoms. I started with simple 1 to 3 ingredients combinations of which were all interchangeable, even the processes were interchangeable. Exhibit G has a combination that is so strong after you quit taking it, that every drug manufacturer on this planet will be wanting to kill me. I did it. It is a food combination. This is a food that can be interchanged with many other like kind ingredients. The processes used are many, but I sampled all of them and eliminated many of the side-effects by eliminating combinations that do not work. It is a processed drug. It is a drug. I spent almost 6 years sampling and changing these to make one interchangeable ingredient great one (with many variations) in best methods exhibit and favorite best methods exhibit and have used hundreds and written thousands. They all are good, but some are better than others. The interchangeability of this drug and the number of interchangeability and processing of ingredients up to 7 is so crucial to making strong or weak drugs and the 7 ingredient combination makes this drug continually medicate the body and it can make other medicines continue also. I can use 3 ingredients, 1 or 7, other combinations and more additions and processes them all many ways.

I am a minister who has prayed my way through this medicine.


1. A method of treating a human suffering from cancer, pain, and Bipolar disorder consisting essentially of administering to said human therapeutically effective amounts of evening primrose oil, rice, sesame seeds, green beans, coffee, meat, cheese, milk, green tea extract, evening primrose seeds, and wine.